i'm a big kid now?

yes i realize that i have been absolutely terrible at blogging lately.

my excuse?

getting ready to move.

that means soaking up all the time possible with my family and friends while slowly packing and deciding what things i am taking and what i am leaving home.

this week i haven't cried much.

the last two weeks were a different story. most of the times i cried it was because of my family. because i am going to miss them like crazy.

anthony is at his senior sunrise right this very minute, i hate so very much that i am going to be in provo for his senior year. hate hate hate hate it.

karst asks if i will be back in town to watch his baseball and football games.

tonight my dad came into my room while i packed and just stood there, then said goodnight. then five minutes later came back into my room and asked for another goodnight hug because he is going to miss them. talk about ripping the heart out!

my mom gets teary whenever it is brought up. when mommy gets teary i get teary.

as hard as it is to leave them i am so grateful that i feel that way. i am glad that my relationship with my family is so close and tight knit that i am not moving out with the sad "so glad i am leaving them"feeling.

if i hand't prayed so hard about this decision and felt the comfort and reassurance of the holy ghost it would be ten times harder.

as depressing as this post seems i truly am extremely excited about this new chapter in my life!

p.s. more catch up to come once i am a settled in provo.